Up Schlitz Creek

It is almost Christmas and I am walkin around in a tank top and talking to girls with hair extensions and missing my brooklyn homies even though I know that they are in 3 feet of snow.
So I decided to show you guys some highlights from their Facebook pages that would make anyone miss these knuckleheads!

Matt "The Cooze"-R.I.P, Larry Sultan. He was most incredible.

Peter- At first I was gonna be like, "who the fuck cares? Fuckin who the fuck is this guy?" But then I checked out some his work and seen mad titties and vaginas and ass. He will be missed.

Pauly D- A Tiger Woods joke! Why Jay Leno, you are just TOO. MUCH!


No one makes a dick joke like 3 dicks from Brooklyn.Ghad I love those dudes.
I used to live with "The Cooze" and he used to yell across the house to me "Liv! Come in here! I need you!" and then I would run in to his room just to find him in his underwear hitting a paddle ball.
He also used to write in the notes section of his rent check "For HJs rendered."
Another time I wanted to introduce Matt to a large group of my friends so while we were waiting on the car service he decided to loosen up by drinking a pint glass of whiskey with 3 frozen grapes in it because we were out of ice. Once we got to the bar he said hi to 3 people and then said "Fuck that guy." and passed out on the table for 30 minutes.
BESTIES!

This is a portrait of Matt and Petey as Siegfried and Roy

So looking at their FB comments really makes me miss the quick wits and dudes I knew I could always count on.
But I have to remember...No one is as smart, funny or pretty as their Facebook page so maybe its for the best.

Merry Christmas from Liv and Natasha!

Wow! This year has really flown by!
Let us get you up to speed..
Well after last summer in LA we went back to Brooklyn and realized that winter is gay.(Seriously. Most songs about winter have the word "gay" right in the lyrics.)
So Natasha and I moved across the country from our beautiful Brooklyn to Los Angeles to change our lives for the better. We have had a rocky beginning but it seems like after six months we are really getting our new lives rolling. We really miss our New York routine and of course, our amazing friends but we are making new friends and we have had east coast visitors almost every month.(Thank Gawd!)
Natasha recently received a Starbucks card that allows her to get free iced coffee refills anytime she wants, and we have both been entering to win LOTS of contests because we love being winners! We also recently decided to be Wiccan, we are still waiting to recieve our "Magical witch names" but we have been taking weird full moon baths, burning sage and watching tons of our new favorite show Eastwick so it's pretty official.
This year I also found out that you can Facebook and blog for money!I've been working with The Comedy Store and The Roxy who are social media geniuses so I started a Social Media company with my friend Berko who works with The Viper Room (also full of geniuses) and we think that 2010 is going to be amazing for us! Follow us on twitter @metalmarketing and on Facebook www.facebook.com/metalmarketing
I have also started booking and promoting out here on the west coast, and I have some amazing stuff in store for LA in 2010! I kicked it all off with Bootyoke at The Comedy Store in November and it was the most kick ass time I have had since I moved here!
We have also noticed that we were getting filmed left and right just for being awesome, which makes us think that we will have our own show in no time!
So in 2010 look out for us on Gene Simmons Family Jewels,Clean House and the web show The Real Sunset Strip with our friends Scheff and Hawk(http://www.facebook.com/REALSUNSETSTRIP) as well as our personal appearances at Musink 2010 ,Ink and Iron and much more!
We have been so lucky to fall in with such a great crew of people and we hope that this is the year that we get on tv, Natasha gets her Dracula tattoo and I get at least one of my sleeves finished. We have also cut down on blogs for the last few months while we got settled in and we wanted to thank you all of bearing with us and we are going to get back to our normal posting about dumb stuff selves in 2010.
We hope you all have a great holiday, a cool Yule and get everything you hoped for!
Now please to enjoy this holiday greeting from our nerdy and awesome friends from The Real Sunset Strip, Scheff and Hawk!
xoxox

Seriously!

is it so hard to find a tattoo artist boyfriend with a neck tattoo who is knowledgeable about heavy metal and sex?
Oh...you have to be crazy.
Dammit.

Finally, we found Fun in LA!!

Finally we found a good ass time in LA. Here's a brief recap of our evening. Keep in mind I got nice and drunk to control my nerves since Liv and I were being filmed for The Real Sunset Strip, so my memory is a bit blurred. Here are some highlights:
We head to On the Rox at the Roxy to get our drink on and meet Scheff and Hawk from The Real Sunset Strip.For those unfamiliar check them out. It's an awesome website and show you can watch on UStream. (www.TheRealSunsetStrip.com)
Since I wasn't wearing a bra, Liv was in charge. Beardo and B Real from Cypress Hill opened for us (so nice of them). If you're wondering why we were being interviewed, it's because we are awesome and people love us. Scheff was so enamored with Liv that he couldn't remember my name, so he has been the lucky recipient of filthy text messages from me ever since. We had an awesome time hanging out with Berko from Viper, Annie and Nick from The Roxy, Erica my favorite person I have met since we moved to LA and a variety of other people who love fun.

After the show, we walked down Sunset to the Andaz hotel where our friend Bird's brother was staying. All I remember is that Liv was trying to get Bird to pull up the cowskin rug that was on the floor and wear it like a cape. You could tell that he really wanted to, but was scared.

On our drive home, we saw a Storm Trooper and chick dress like Leia in a car next to us. I rolled down the window and started asking them questions, Liv said red to the storm trooper " Its been really cold huh? What is this, Hoth?!" and then I screamed "I'm an EWOK!!!!!" as we drove by. It was pretty awesome.

I'm so glad we finally had fun, I feel like we're finding our little L.A. crew out here.

Follow everyone on twitter:
RealSunsetStrip
TheRoxy
Scheffxp
ADrox3
Berkorules
TheHawkShow
and of course US Natasha_Darling and LivvieSmalls

Shred Savage presents BOOTYOKE LA!

...I fucking told you guys that I party!
Thank you SO much to Chris Goldteeth and Lord Easy, I love you guys! Come back soon!

OMG! MSNBC's twitter just got hacked!

OH MY GHAAAD!
This shit is so funny! If I had money I would offer to buy the person responsible for this a beer!!
I don't know how to screen shot on a mac so I just took a photo on my phone..

Cream of Jeans Soup.

So I FINALLY got tickets to see the The Tonight Show with Conan, and the guest is CREED! It's like they got back together just to piss me off!If Creed loves Jesus so much then why do they make music that makes people wanna kill themselves?!
Well thankfully they got back together just in time for Slayer's new album to put a hex on them!
Preview it here-
http://www.spinner.com/new-releases#/2
The whole thing is amazing but I particularly love "Playing with Dolls" it is very Danzig like, and "Not of this God" is so speed metal thrash that I wanna swoon!
This comes just in time for my planning of Speed Metal Dating coming soon!!