What Will They Do for Money? The Story of the $1000 HJ

So my car has been overheating and I brought it in today to see what it's damn problem was, and it appears that the problem (details are uninteresting) is going to deplete my entire bank account, leaving me with approximately $200 to live off of. no problem right? I hate getting upset over money, it's only money you can always get more. The question is how..
Here are some viable options. I think there could be a TV show to see what we will try to do for money:

1.Cut off all my hair for $350. Then I will be hideous and no one will like me.Plus if I decide to reintroduce sex into my life, this removes the chance to get my hair pulled and that's just no fun.

2.Dress up like some movie or comic book character on Hollywood Blvd. and take photos with tourists for tips. I actually see no problems with this plan, I just have to figure out which character to be. The obvious choice of Catwoman wouldn't work because there are already about 12 of them and they all just look like dominatrix.I'll be accepting ideas as to who I should be. I think Liv and I should do something as a team, but she's not sold on my Khloe and Kim Kardashian plan.

3. As you know if you know me at all, I love animals, especially dogs and I have always been the go to person whenever someone needs a dogsitter. I was once puppysitting my friend Dave's white pitbull puppy Echo and he got all muddy at the park. So I felt bad and decided to give him a bath..but Dave didn't have a bath only a standup shower, so I just took a shower with the dog to clean him up. This was where I got my foolproof business plan for IShowerWithYourDog.com. Basically, I will shower with your dog.. and you can watch it streaming and pay me via paypal. Also I accept checks and tacos.

4.Then there's Liv's idea, the $1,000 handjob. If you put an ad on Craigslist offering a platinum HJ for a grand, you would get customers just based on curiosity. People will assume it's absolutely amazing to warrant a $1000 price tag and guys will get one just for the mere status. Once he tells all of his friends about it, they too will want to sample it. Before you know it Diddy will be giving gift certificates to all of his employees for Christmas with a bottle of Ciroc Vockka.

Ok I think I have a good start, all of these ideas seem pretty good, except the hair cut. I'll let you know how things go. Live long and prosper.